She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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