Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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