I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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