Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Randomize
