We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
