Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
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