what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize
