Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
