yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize