I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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