Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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