my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
