he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
whose ass print is on the piano?
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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