whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
