I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
