ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize
