We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
