butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
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