I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Randomize
