wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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