I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
