Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
