Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I'm at about main and main street
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
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