Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I can't trust your balls anymore.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
