If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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