Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Drunk walkin through police station. America
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
