he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
