I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
