Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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