U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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