Cold hands, warm shart.
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
