the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
