I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize
