That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
ugly people sure do ruin things
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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