The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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