How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
