I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
