So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize