Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
