There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
