Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize