fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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