Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
