so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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