would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
