You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
