Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
send nudes
from the living room?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
