bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
should my penis look like a turkey
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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