This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
