We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
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