So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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